Jay Leno is going back to The Tonight Show. Sorry Jay, but you're in a gotsta go situation. I stick up for comedians every chance I get, but not if they're being a jerk. I know you loved having The Tonight Show, but you can't take it back and still be loved.
I wanted The Jay Leno Show to work, not because I like the show, but because it was just another platform for comedians to gain exposure. Parts were good, others were beyond terrible (I'm talking to you 10 at 10).
I don't think Jay should retire, but move on. You should create something fresh and new for yourself at another network (It's not going to happen, but it should).
And for you Conan, you will be missed... until September. Well all you can do now is move on and make a superior product to what NBC will be throwing out there. Don't mess this up, because right now you have public support on your side. Letterman made the mistake of being soft when he first went to CBS. Keep your edge.
The big winner right now is David Letterman. He's snappy, fresh, relevant, and biting. Right now The Late Show is at it's peak, and Letterman is at his best--AT 62 YEARS OLD! He may not be a good man, but he's a GREAT host. If he had been this sharp the whole time, he would have never lost the ratings war to Leno. He not trying to please others, and in turn he's killing.
The future winner is Jimmy Fallon. He's going to end up with The Tonight Show after Leno has an on-air death due to heart failure in 5 years. Now I just need to get good enough that I can take over Late Night!
Jokes (as protest, I won't be using the term "Headlines" anymore):
A father just named his son "J.E.T.S." he tried to explain, but all the doctor could hear was “I’m a nut bag.”
Conan O'Brien left The Tonight Show saying, "I believe in opportunities. Now Jay has the opportunity to fulfill his dream of screwing it up for a second time."
David Letterman's take on the Late Night Wars II: "Finally a scandal that doesn't include me or my sex life!"
Jay Leno has decided to return to The Tonight Show for one very important reason: money to buy more cars.
Video:
Who is your favorite talk-show host?
Showing posts with label Late Show. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Late Show. Show all posts
Monday, January 25, 2010
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
My apologies!
How time can get away from you when you're busy!
It's been a little over a month since I last wrote an entry.
I'll make up for it by posting my Green Jokes rejected by Letterman.
1. Republicans have gained unfair criticism for being anti-environment considering they’ve been running their party on wind for years.
2. On the heals of “An Inconvenient Truth,” Al Gore has just released “Our Choice” urging the public to make radical changes for the environment cautioning, “if we don’t change now, I’ll release another book.”
3. America finally got a wake up call about Global Warming this week when it was announce the Coca-Cola polar bear drowned due to ice cap melting.
4. Due to melting ice caps, Santa has been forced to move his workshop operations to India.
5. Climate change has wreaked havoc across the globe the past decade with a dramatic increase in temperatures, vast death of wild life, and increased frequency and destructive power of tropical storms. But on the plus side, Milwaukee is almost bearable in November.
6. Climate change has caused an increase in migratory wildlife patterns, causing some predatory animals to seek refuge in territories they don’t belong. In a related story, Sarah Palin has left Alaska to embark on her lower 48 book tour beginning Nov. 18.
7. With dozens of new green cars coming out ever year, the green initiative has found scores of new was for guys to not get dates. Once you go green, you’ll never be seen.
8. Hollywood is often ahead of the curve on environment affairs: Ms. Piggy went green years ago.
9. Biofuels are getting some criticism for harming the world’s corn supply. Luckily a new biofuel is being made out of a food supply nobody will miss: White Castle.
10. Al Gore decided to go with “Our Choice” as his next book rather than his original idea, “Livin’ La Vida Loca.”
11. California continues to lead the way in Green technology. In fact, Joan Rivers now runs on biofuel.
12. If the world wants to get rid of some green house gasses, I suggest we get my dad to stop ordering Dominos.
13. Trucking companies have been slow to adopt clean energy. Not surprising since they have been slow to adopt clean truckers.
14. Jay Leno is a big proponent of green cars, which is ironic considering his car collection accounts for nearly half of US emissions.
15. Beer makers are now able to recover nearly 50% of energy cost from leftovers. This is great news for Mel Gibson.
16. KFC has gone green; they’ve chosen to combine all their food into one slop bowl. Trust me, that’s turned a lot of people green.
17. China has declared that they will be leading the world in green energy. I don’t know about you, but when I think green, I think China.
18. Just to be clear China’s green world pledge excludes anything in their products that could kill your kids or pets.
19. A new study shows that Hillbillies are the greenest people; no electricity usage and their restroom is a bush.
20. Many big corporations are now going green. GM and Chrysler are doing their part by making sure none of their cars are on the road.
And in the spirit of Christmas:
Next time: It's Christmas story time! Got one of your own?
It's been a little over a month since I last wrote an entry.
I'll make up for it by posting my Green Jokes rejected by Letterman.
1. Republicans have gained unfair criticism for being anti-environment considering they’ve been running their party on wind for years.
2. On the heals of “An Inconvenient Truth,” Al Gore has just released “Our Choice” urging the public to make radical changes for the environment cautioning, “if we don’t change now, I’ll release another book.”
3. America finally got a wake up call about Global Warming this week when it was announce the Coca-Cola polar bear drowned due to ice cap melting.
4. Due to melting ice caps, Santa has been forced to move his workshop operations to India.
5. Climate change has wreaked havoc across the globe the past decade with a dramatic increase in temperatures, vast death of wild life, and increased frequency and destructive power of tropical storms. But on the plus side, Milwaukee is almost bearable in November.
6. Climate change has caused an increase in migratory wildlife patterns, causing some predatory animals to seek refuge in territories they don’t belong. In a related story, Sarah Palin has left Alaska to embark on her lower 48 book tour beginning Nov. 18.
7. With dozens of new green cars coming out ever year, the green initiative has found scores of new was for guys to not get dates. Once you go green, you’ll never be seen.
8. Hollywood is often ahead of the curve on environment affairs: Ms. Piggy went green years ago.
9. Biofuels are getting some criticism for harming the world’s corn supply. Luckily a new biofuel is being made out of a food supply nobody will miss: White Castle.
10. Al Gore decided to go with “Our Choice” as his next book rather than his original idea, “Livin’ La Vida Loca.”
11. California continues to lead the way in Green technology. In fact, Joan Rivers now runs on biofuel.
12. If the world wants to get rid of some green house gasses, I suggest we get my dad to stop ordering Dominos.
13. Trucking companies have been slow to adopt clean energy. Not surprising since they have been slow to adopt clean truckers.
14. Jay Leno is a big proponent of green cars, which is ironic considering his car collection accounts for nearly half of US emissions.
15. Beer makers are now able to recover nearly 50% of energy cost from leftovers. This is great news for Mel Gibson.
16. KFC has gone green; they’ve chosen to combine all their food into one slop bowl. Trust me, that’s turned a lot of people green.
17. China has declared that they will be leading the world in green energy. I don’t know about you, but when I think green, I think China.
18. Just to be clear China’s green world pledge excludes anything in their products that could kill your kids or pets.
19. A new study shows that Hillbillies are the greenest people; no electricity usage and their restroom is a bush.
20. Many big corporations are now going green. GM and Chrysler are doing their part by making sure none of their cars are on the road.
And in the spirit of Christmas:
Next time: It's Christmas story time! Got one of your own?
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Who's Right: Letterman or Palin?
If you don't know what's going on in the late night comedy/political crossover battle, here's a quick recap.
Abbi posted a comment yesterday: "Letterman was right the first time when he apologized with humor. Unfunny apologies are for funerals."
My spin? He's a comedian. He made a joke. Let's all get over it.
Here's a few replacement monologue jokes about the governor's family trip to Yankee Stadium:
One awkward moment for Sarah Palin, in the seventh inning her daughter was shot up with steroids by Alex Rodriguez.
OR
One awkward moment for Sarah Palin at the Yankee game, after being given an Alex Rodriguez her daughter had a choking fit because she mistakenly thought it was October.
OR
One awkward moment for Sarah Palin, because her daughter is such a huge A-Rod fan, Willow left her wife and kids for Madonna.
How about this, how about we treat women with more respect in general?
That being said, other things I noticed from the Late Show's first guest (who happened to be a woman) last night:
Michelle Pfeiffer looks amazing for 90 years old! What's that, she's 50? Oh, yeah still pretty good.
I'm having trouble falling asleep, Michelle would you mind telling us another story?
Michelle says, "I'm not joking." I say, "I don't think you're capable of joking, that implies entertainment."
"She's going to tell a Scarface story about fighting for the part, getting fired, getting rehired, then slicing Al Pacino up with glass and spraying blood everywhere?! SNOOZE-FEST!"
Tomorrow: Is there a difference between the likes of Olberman or Limbaugh versus Bill Maher or Dennis Miller? Leave a comment now, and I'll address it in tomorrow's post.
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