Wednesday, December 16, 2009

I ate Christmas

I ate a Christmas bulb ornament. No not this year! When I was 4. I was young but I wasn't stupid. I knew it wasn't a real apple, but I still thought it would be a good idea to take a bite out of it. I was using my imagination, however glass doesn't play pretend.
I calmly told my parents, "Father, Mother, I seem to have a shard of glass in my gums. Wouldn't you be so kind as to take me to the hospital."
Well like any set good hysterical parents they burned rubber to the local emergency room. Even though this was 1983 rual Missouri, the medical community was surprisingly slow. While waiting I finally got the glass out with my tongue. So in way I gave my dad what any parent wants, a big medical bill for absolutely no reason.
And because of this incident, our trees were shockingly bare for the first 4 feet and my dad still would only let me use a preschool train set when I was in Junior High.
Ah, warm Christmas memories.

Gotta love this video:

Next: How to ring in the New Year. How did you do it this year? Have a favorite one?


EspressoVein said...

This brings more suspicion onto you for this years' missing popcorn stings!

Abbi Crutchfield said...

@ EspressoVein: LOLOL!

Luke, is this why you hate fresh fruit and vegetables?